Broken Open

Unsent

Sad Time Passed

(2-28-03)

Why do I
Keep hurting
For you?
Less than gracious
You ripped me in two.
I can't seem
To put the parts
Back together again.
So used and played
I feel.
Understand,
Almost a year later
I can't make love
without feeling like
I am cheating on you.
Stupid, yes, I know,
But far beyond my control.
The only sex I can enjoy
Is anonymous and dark.
Public and brilliant.
I can't afford
To get even
A little close.
Far too much at risk.
I am raw and tattered.
I so desire
To share
My pitiful existence
With someone.
Thought it was you.
I have been fooled
Many times before.
And I will yield again
To the next savior.
But now,
Now I eat the bitter root of
The harvest I have sown.
I thought,
I thought I knew you.
I think,
You think you know me.
Suddenly I realize
Strangers,
You and I.
Nothing but a moment
In this
Big picture.
Nothing more than
Sad time passing.